Christmas Pics

Just wanted to post pictures of the boys from Christmas morning, for relatives who have been waiting for them. Sorry its tooken me so long to do it, things here have been crazy. Lucy is not with us anymore, and most her pups are gone as well. Lucy is at the humane society waiting to be seen by the vet they use monday. From there hopefully its not to late to help her get better, if not she will be put down so she's not in pain anymore. 6 of her pups are in foster care, since I couldn't afford the formula for all of them. I still have Oreo and Panda with us. They are actually starting to eat puppy food now, we still have to mix some formula with it. But they seem to have put weight on and are doing good. Nice plumpy puppies. Bryce and Vance are attached to them, they roll around all morning playing with the pups. Bryce still asks why Lucy had to go to the dr, and why she couldn't stay here. We tried to explain to him why she had to go away to get better, but he still forgets and asks the next day.

The boys both have had a really bad case of the runs and a fever. So thats been fun to deal with the last 48hrs, very pissy kids at the moment. Poor Bryce had it the worse on Christmas day, but he still tried to enjoy everything and play with his presents. Other then the boys not feeling good, we've been enjoying Vance's time off. Its been nice having him home this last week. He had to work tonight, but will be off til the 1st after tonight. Not bad, all in all he will have been off 12 days.

Well I need to get off here, have some stuff to do before bed. Hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!!!

Lucy

Panda, she looks like her mommy. We're going to keep her.

Lucy with her newborn puppies.

Vance with Lucy the day we took her in.

Lucy's first car ride, she loves to ride in the car.

So we came to a decision today about Lucy. Going to give her up to the Humane Society. The vet she goes to says her condition is getting worse, the she might not even live thru the treatment. The humane society says they will give her a fighting chance if I surrender her, and if they can't help her. She will be put down, so she's not in pain or miserable anymore. Making this choice was hard for me, been thinking about it for a week now, trying to figure out what she needed the most right now. We're holding on to her in til the puppies are able to live with just puppy food, plus gives me more time before I have to say goodbye to her. I've been crying all day, and know I'm going to start crying some more when we give her up. I know its the right thing to do but so hard to do. I've only had her in my life since Oct but feel like she's been here forever. She's such a sweetheart, and is so good with the boys. They love playing with her when she feels up to it. Bryce calls her Lucy Goosey, thats his name for her. We're probably going to keep one of her pups. Going to keep Panda, she looks just like her mommy. Right now we're just going to enjoy the little time we have left til we give her up.

I'm not looking forward to saying goodbye to Lucy at all. I feel so horrible that it comes down to this. But want the best for her. Hoping they can help her get healthy again, if not at least I know they won't let her suffer in pain or anything.

Guess I'm going to close this entry here, need to stop crying and get the house cleaned up.

baby registry

So just wanted to post all the info to our baby registry. That way family knew where to look if they want to send anything for little Aiden. I already see some things are coming in. :o) Thanks to anyone who sends anything for baby. Its really appreciated.

To get to our registry just go to Walmart. com to the baby registry part. Its under Cassandra and Vance Braziel, colorado springs, co. I'm not trying to make anyone feel like they need to send anything, just putting it out there for anyone who wants to send anything.

If you have anymore questions just give us a call. :o)

Baby checkup

Went to my baby check up this morning. Everything is on track. Aiden's heartbeat is still around 150, been that way the whole pregnancy. I did feel him flip last night, except he flipped back into breech position. He's stubborn already. First I was told they estimate him to be 7lbs now I'm being told he could be bigger then both his brothers. Maybe he wants to show them who the boss is? She gave me a pregnancy support belt, hopfeully that will help with the back pain. I also went down to labs and did my glucose test. If everything is good I won't hear from her, if I have to do the 3 hr one she'll call me in the next 2 days. Other then that everything is fine and dandy. She told me she won't induce me in less of a medical issue or I hit 41weeks. So I HOPE he will come on his own. That the stripping of my membranes helps get him out or else we might not see him til March. She also told me how they rarely have to do c-sections, that the rate is 10%. Which is awesome, I do NOT want to be cut open. Have a fear of it, and would like to avoid it if I can. Other then all that I see dr again on Jan 20 at 10am. I also start breastfeeding classes on Jan 8 and 6pm. Well going to keep this entry short, have some folding to do. Take care everyone! :o)

Pictures of prego belly!

Just wanted to post pics I took today of my growing belly. Yes, I feel huge. Plus my back hurts all the time now, and my hips. This baby loves playing kick mommy's hips. Think it wants me to suffer til he gets here. Evil baby, lol. Oh don't mind my mommy marks, couldn't get them blurred out..grr. Only 10 more weeks til his eviction date, lol.

Christmas, kids, dr apts, etc.

Think we're finally ready for Christmas to be here. The gifts are all wrapped and put away so the boys can't find them. Well we still get gifts from grandparents in the mail, so wrapping those as they come in. We have everything ready for Christmas dinner, the tree has been up for 2wks now. Plus it will be our first white Christmas if it keeps snowing like it has been.

I have dr apt and labs tomorrow morning from 9:30 - noon. What fun, huh? I'm not looking forward to having the glucose test done. Hopefully I don't get called in for the 3hr test. This will be the second time I have done the 1hr test for it. Hoping labs aren't to bust tomorrow and that I can be in and out of there in no time.

Need to make Caleb an apt for sometime coming up. So he can get his check up and shots. Not looking forward to the shot part, or the check up. He hates when they get him naked, and will shots make all kids grouchy. Hopefully we'll have a easy time til we get to the shots, I don't expect him not to cry for those. Just want to get pass the actual check up before he has his meltdown.

At the moment looks like I'll have my mom and Vance in the delivery room. Use to just having Vance these the last two times, and my mom on the phone. Vance is looking forward to it since he thinks, he'll get to sleep the whole time. Haha, he wishes. Make his butt stay up with me the whole time, he can play cards with my mom or something. Getting anxious about Aiden's arrival. Be 30wks this saturday, not to much longer. I wonder who he will look like. Well he have curly hair like Vance and Caleb or straight hair like me and Bryce. Or will he be a bald baby. Will he be super hairy all over like Caleb was. Caleb seems to have Vance's gorilla genes. Was born with black hair all over from head to toe. Still has black butt hair, lol. Oh and I found little black hairs popping up on his head. I guess his blonde curls will be black curls eventually. He takes after Vance alot more then Bryce. Actually they both have more Vance then me in them, if I had not given birth to them I would think they were someone else's lol.

Someone please tell me that Bryce will grow out of this attitude phase soon? He thinks he's the boss of everyone and thing. He always gets attitude about cleaning up his messes, or thinks its funny to be mean to Caleb. He's driving me up the wall at times. Nothing seems to work on him. I'm starting to think he's going to be a pain in the butt forever.

Caleb is starting to get more of his own personality. He likes things, that Bryce doesn't and hates things that Bryce does. He lets his voice be heard when he's mad or thinks we're not listening. Always learning new words and trying to make 2 words senteces. He learned how to say the word please, so working on him using more when he wants more juice or anything. We're still going thru the seperation anxiety phase still. He has to be up me or Vance's butt at all times it seems. If he can't find us he'll start crying.

Not sure what else to write at the moment. I'm baking a yummy cake, want some? hehe. I'm craving cake so decided to make one since I'm bored. Vance is at work, he'll be home around 11 tonight. So just me, and the boys tonight. Hoping time well pass by fast so I can get to bed early, feel so tired. I stay tired it seems, I know I'm in the last trimester or as my dr calls it the "sleepy trimester". All I do is sleep when I can get the time. I'm starting to think I'm a hibernating like a bear, lol. I only get up when I'm hungry and then pass back out if Vance is home. Yes I know how lazy of me. Well I'm getting off here, need to go frost my cake. :o)

29 weeks and other stuff.

^^ thats the theme we're going with for Aiden's room.

So I'm 29wks and 3 days today!


Yes I'm very pumped to be almost done with this pregnancy. Ready to meet little Aiden and bring him home. We're slowly working on his baby stuff. Granted we barely have anything, Vance says we will have it all next month when he gets back pay. Hopefully that will hurry up. Since we're hurting on bills and everything. My mom is getting us the crib for little Aiden. Which helps out alot. We have some stuff from the boys left over, like walker, bouncer, diaper genie, clothes, stroller, bumbo chair, boppy pillow, and some other stuff I can not think of at the moment. I went ahead and order Aiden crib set and the stuff that comes with it. 13 piece set for awesome price on ebay it should be here sometime next week at the latest. Bryce and Vance picked it out. They wanted to pick this baby room theme out. I can't believe I'm getting close to the end. I hit 36 wks at the end of January. From there my midwives will decided when to strip my membranes and try to get little Aiden out. I want to go into labor on my own for once, always been induced. Would be nice to go on my own one time. But I want him to be safe so if they need to induce me for him to be safe then I'm all for it. He'll probably be here be Valentine's day! So we'll have 3 little boys in no time. Vance is getting fixed after I have Aiden. No more babies for us.

I bought the boys Christmas gifts, all wrapped away in the closet. Can't wait to see their faces when they open the gifts we got them. Money might be tight but we're managing to have a nice little Christmas here. Plus the boys will be getting gifts from grandparents as well. So they will have plenty to open Christmas morning.

We took the boys to see Santa at the mall, yesterday. Bryce was all pumped up til it was his turn. Then he got scared and was wanting to hurry up and take the pic. He kept wanting to leave, and was not liking that santa was not in his red outfit he wears in all the movies. He was in pj's it looked like. So Bryce was not impressed and kept asking why he wasn't dressed right. Caleb looked like a deer in the headlights on santa's lap. When I get the pic on the computer I'll post it. My kids looks like they were in shock and scared. Maybe next year will be better?

Hmmm..what else is there to talk about on here. Vance has 5 more days of work then he is off til January! So it will be nice to have him home for almost 2wks straight. Plus he loves all the he gets with this command then when he was on a boat. He does not miss the boat at all . I miss ga weather but not he boat. I like having him home. He never realized how much energy the boys had or how much it takes to watch them til now. He so use to leaving ever 3 months, that he never was around to see what all I go thru with the boys. He's really nervous to see what life with a newborn is like. With Bryce and Caleb he was deployed soon after their birth. Bryce was 3wks when he left and Caleb was only 4 days old when Vance left then. So this time he will be here the whole time, for all the night feedings, or sleep deprived nights. He's nervous and yet ready for it at the same time. He's alot more understanding and is realizing what I all I go thru while he was gone.

Bryce and Caleb are doing good. Getting big and causing trouble whenever they can. Always taking turns driving me crazy. Bryce is ready for another brother some what. Which Caleb still doesn't get whats going on. He's only 18 months so he still in his own little world it seems. He's learning new words and able to tell us what he wants more. But still has his meltdowns we can't understand what he wants or needs. Plus he never seems to sleep well at night, always getting up crying through out the night. Never can go a whole night asleep. He usually is up every hr crying. He doesn't have an ear infection or anything. Not sure why he gets up crying. I wish I knew.

Bryce is wanting to go to school next year and always want more alone time. He wants us to let him have his own room and move Caleb and Aiden together. He calls his room Bryce room and not Bryce and Caleb's room. Or trys to kick Caleb out of it when he's had enough of his little brother. So its been a pain trying to talk to him abut it. Plus lately he seems to think its ok to spit or hit Caleb when he's in a bad mood. *sighs* I was hoping this wouldn't happen for another year at least. Sometimes Bryce can be a pain in the butt. Then others he's a sweetheart.


Well I need to get off here, need to do some laundry and change out the puppys bedding.

What to do?

Have a lot on my mind with what to do for Lucy. I want her to have the best life possible, and give her everything. Thats why we took her in. Then we found out she had heartworms. Which the first vet put her on meds said that would take care of it. Then she saw another vet who was pissed at the first vet. Because he should have never given her the pills in til her heat cycle was over and confirm she wasn't prego. She turned up prego, so off those meds she went. Everything is good with the pups she has 8 pups, none have heartworms. They can't get them from her in less a mosquito bites her then them. Its to cold for mosquitos right now, plus they all stay nice and warm in the office all day. Now my concerns, after she is done nursing her pups, she will need to get treatment. Since she is getting really bad, and heartworms can cause major damage to her real quick. Well the treatment is around 1,200. Which at the moment is impossible for us to afford, or I would be happy to pay for all of it. I'm going to get the xray done to make sure its not to late for her. They need to do an xray/sonogram to see how bad her case is. From there they can tell me if she'll make it thru the treatment or is it better to put her down. :o( Which I would hate to see. If it is safe for her to do treatment, I might need to find her someone who is able to give her what she needs to survive this. I would hate to say goodbye, but I want her to have a long healthy life. At the moment I wish I could pay for the treatment on my own and keep her. She's the most lovable dog. Very quiet and gentle, house broken, well behaved, loves my kids, etc. Just want to get her healthy and with money being super tight its hard for me to do that at the moment. I'm not looking forward to the shit I'll get from people who can't see that I really am trying to help her, if that means giving her to someone who can afford to do this treatment for her. What does everyone else think? I've been debating this in my mind for a few days now. I would feel alot better knowing she has someone who can get her the medical help she needs, instead of watching her slowly pass away. Someone please let me know what they would do. I'm really torn here, and want the best for Lucy.

Her puppies are doing good, they all open their eyes. Some are walking around, some still crawling. Oreo seems to be leading her brother and sisters. She's the first to do everything, open her eyes, walk, bark, etc. She's already has a forever home waiting for her. So I'm happy to know she'll be tooken care of. She's going to my moms. So I'll see her when I'm in Texas.

Vance and I are thinking about keeping Panda, she reminds us so much of her mommy. Especially if we have to say goodbye to Lucy we would like to keep one of her babies.

I have 6 more beautiful little pups to find homes for. They are very lovable I lay in the office playing with all of them, everyday. They love to cuddle and be loved on. Their starting to realize they have voices and are letting their voice be heard. We get little barks here and there, when they want attention. Or when they need Lucy to come to them. I really want to make sure they go to good homes, and not dog fighters or anyone like that. So I'm being super picky on who will get one of these adorable pups. Prefer them to go to people we know, so we can see them from time to time. Yes I'm attached to all of them.


Ok this must seem like a long post to write about Lucy and her pups. But I need some advice on what to do. I'm really torn at the moment.

fun, fun..

In the last 48hrs I have gotten about 4hrs of sleep on and off. I'm so freaking tired today, I wish I could crawl in bed and sleep. Vance is at work so I can't. Plus now I have a stomach ache, keep feeling like I'm going to hurl. But haven't so far. My body is always aching all over. Taking care of Bryce and Caleb is getting harder every day. The baby has been laying on a nerve since I was 20wks. Which causes the worst leg/back pain. I can't bend over at all without crying. My left knee which isn't the best gives out when I walk at times. So I avoid stairs, since I'm scared it will give out and I'll fall. I am 28wks today, getting so close to due date. Ready for Aiden to be here, ready to have my body back to myself.

This is our last baby, people ask why not try for a girl. My body hates pregnancy thats why. I always having issues through out the pregnancy with bleeding, blood pressure, chest pains. Plus in delivery I always seem to have something go wrong. Like preeclampsia, hemorrhaging, etc. I'm already terrified of giving birth this time, just because my dr is certain the hemmorrhaging will happen again. She said this time I will need blood after its all over with. So I've been nervous about getting someone else's blood. I really don't want anyone else's blood in less I know them personally.

Ready for my next apt to hit already so I can ask to be checked. Just been having contractions on and off for weeks. Plus so much pressure all the time. I feel like Aiden is ramming his head on my cervix all day long. Sometimes all the pressure makes me feel like, he's going to just drop out of me while I'm walking.

Caleb and Bryce are doing good. Bryce is excited that Christmas is getting closer. He has a list of things he would like to ask Santa for. He is very pumped up Christmas. Every morning he asks "how many more days?" He is still adjusting to the thought of another little brother. He's not looking forward to all the crying a babys does. He still insists that we're having a little girl. He wants a sister not another brother.

Caleb is talking more and more everyday. He can now say snack, trash, cracker, yogurt, cookie, drink, no, yes, hush, bryce, momma, dada, hat, and some other things I can't think of at the moment. He seems to learn a new word everyday. Just runs around repeating the new word he can say that day. At the moment he seems to have acid reflex really bad. Especially at night. I need to get him in for that, nothing I give him at works seems to help. Plus he started running a fever, coughing all last night. So today has been a fun day of crying and wanting to be held all day.


Not much more to write at the moment. Think I'm going to go lay on the couch for awhile. I have had the urge to hurl all day, and really just want to crash at the moment. Vance will be home in an hour, then I am so laying down for a little bit

Let it snow, let it snow, let is snow.

Figure I would update since I haven't in awhile. Plus I'm bored, nothing else to do today. Its freezing outside, snowing like crazy. Everyone is so excited about snow, I'm really that excited. I miss my Georgia weather, I like heat. Not big on the cold, lol. Makes me want to crawl in bed all day, sleeping. Going to go take pics of it a few.

I'm almost 28wks, woohoo! We're getting there, slowly. Don't see the dr til the 18, which would put me at 29 1/2wks . Funny thing, your suppose to have your glucose test at 28wks. Yet the weird dr I saw last time wouldn't put it in. So when I see my usual midwife Mercedes, she'll probably flip out that I haven't had it yet. She likes everything to be done on time. I've had a few on and off contractions. Nothing to big to panic about. I'm going to get check at my next apt, just have this feeling I'm dilating. Just feel lots of pressure at times. Feels like baby is stuck down low lately.

Lucy had her puppies. She had a litter of 9, but one was still born. He was born with a hole in his chest, so Vance took him away. He was trying to get him before Lucy realize he was gone. But she still noticed. We have 7 girls and 1 boy. They will be ready for new homes by Valentine's Day. Hoping to find good homes for them. 3 are really big like Lucy, the rest are itty bitty things like Shadow. They were born on Dec. 1. She had the last pup at 5pm and had started at 6am that day.


Well going to get off here for now. Just figure I would write a quick little update since I'm bored.

Pregnancy Blues

The closer I get to my due date, the more anxious/nervous I get. I have even had days where I was wanting baby to hurry up and be here. I just have so many concerns and issues. Can I handle 3 kids? Will this delivery go good? Should I worry about getting blood? Am I going to have the blues when baby is here? Will I be ready for Aiden to come home? Just so many thoughts run thru my head all day long. I think I over worry but can't seem to make myself stop. I know I don't have to much longer til Aiden is here, just ready for that day to arrive.

Tried talking to Vance about all my concerns but sometimes I don't think it gets it. Or even understands, he tells me I'm over reacting alot. I don't think I am. I wish I could not worry so much and enjoy this last pregnancy but I can't seem to make myself. I wish, Vance could be pregnant for a day so he could see how I feel. Or go thru. *sighs*

We've decided money wise, its best to stay in this apartment another year. Vance is giving up his office so that Aiden can have a nursery. In the next 2 months we need to come up with 600 so that we can have everything for Aiden. Thats about how much it all will cost to be ready for him. So going to have a tight budget, especially since its the holidays. I think we can make this work, just got to stick to a budget. Even if it means staying home til then.

The way the doctor has been talking, Aiden will probably be here by Valentine's day. So not to much longer. Can't wait to see our last little boy. I think he looks like his brother in the ultrasound pics. But still can't wait to hold him for the first time.


Bryce is having a hard time adjusting to another sibling. He acts out more the closer my due date approaches. He tells me he doesn't want another brother. That he wants to be my baby again. Doesn't even try to go potty in toilet anymore, throw fits, doesn't listen at all. Trying to give him more attention, and make sure he is included with Aiden's arrival. Just nothing seems to help him not be so angry or upset with us. He tells me all the time that brothers make him frustrated, or annoy him. What do I do to help him with this? I have no idea on what to do anymore. I really don't. I wish I did.

Well need to get off here, take some tylenol for my headache. Started to feel better, think I'm almost done with this stomach flu.

Labor and Delivery visit

So yesterday, I ended up in L&D. We have the stomach flu going around, I finally caught it. So call the nurse and told her how I was sick. She had me come in since she was worried about baby, he wasn't moving as much as he usually does. Was hooked up for the monitors for a few hrs, with IV fluid going. Aiden did good while monitoring. They actually said he was one of the most active 25wk old babys they have ever monitored. Which made me feel better. Finish getting some much needed fluid, then off to the pharmacy down stairs. That place was crowded with sick people. I had to wait behind 48ppl to get my meds. The whole time I was there, I was fighting the urge to hurl. I felt like shit, weak and dizzy. When I was on the elevator two army guys asked me if I needed help walking, they thought I was going to pass out in front of them.

I'm feeling a little better today, the meds are helping a little. Just laying around, drinking plenty of fluid for both Aiden and myself. He's kicking alot more today, which makes me not worry so much. Well going to get off here, boys are napping. I have tons of laundry to catch up on now.

It's a BOY!

It's a boy!

Little squishy face!

Sticking his tongue out!

His eyes are open and he is sucking his thumb!

Back from the my 3d/4d ultrasound. It's official we're having a boy!!! He looks like his brothers, he kept covering his face with his feet and hands. But we got a few good ones of him yawning, sucking his fingers, etc. So cute! He even had his eyes open for awhile. Which was neat and looked a little creepy at the same time, lol. Can't wait til February so we can finally meet him. Hope everyone likes the pictures.

Figure I would post a blog.

Yep, its been 10days so figure I should write something. As to what I should write about, I'm not sure. I've been sick lately, so mostly sleeping alot. I love sleep lately, so nice to crawl in bed and pass out. I don't sleep the day away or anything like that. Just my lovely children have decided that mommy doesn't need sleep. Let me explain.

The boys usually are in bed asleep by 8. Sometimes earlier if its been a long day. Well I usually am ready for bed by 10, so I will crawl in bed with Vance and we chat about the day. Usually we're both ready to call it a night at 11:30. I usually am out in 20mins. Only for Caleb to wake me up usually around 12:15. In which he climbs in our bed and wants to cuddle. Which is fine, he's still little and wants to feel safe. Except, he never wants to go back to sleep. He will throw a hissy fit for hours, by hours I mean til 3:30. Then he finally passes out and starts snoring. So I take advantage of it and pass out. Well, then around 4:15ish Bryce decides that its time for everyone to get up. He usually walks in the room and tells me "good morning, where's my cereal?" I kid you not, my child has always been a morning person, since moving to Colorado he has been up way to early for me to handle. Usually if I tell him its not time to get up he will climb up beside me and lay down. Granted he's only quiet for 45mins til he starts messing with me or Caleb. So by the time its all over with it is 6am and Vance is finally getting up for the day to give me a break. Since he sleep thru all this, its only fair he gets up so I can get 3 or 4hrs of sleep to keep me sane. Thats our usual night around here, so that is why I'm usually alsleep if you call me before 11. Even though some think I'm being lazy, when I'm not.

Sorry if I bored you with my sleep scheldule. Just like I said nothing much to write about. This week I have my 24wk check up and labs. Boo to glucose testing! That stuff is just horrible. Then on the 14 I have Lucy apt with the vet. Where we will find out if she's prego or not. Anyone want a chimation if she is? Or mini dalmation, as some people call them. She will also be doing her heartworm treatment. Its going to be a long month for her to recover from it. Poor girl. :o( Then on the 15 I will be 25 weeks, and getting my 3D/4D ultrasound! So excited, to get tons of pics of baby and find out the sex for sure. Its a 30min ultrasound, they will be putting tons of pics and the whole thing on cd-rom for me. So you can bet I will be posting when I get my butt home. I can't wait, ready to see baby. Plus get a glimpse on who this baby will take after.

The boys are doing good. Bryce is acting out alot the last few days. He loses all his privleges and still wants to rebel against everything. I'm not sure what to do anymore. He refuses to potty in the toilet, hits his brother, refuses to eat whats in front of him, breaks things on purpose. Omg, sometimes I joke about pre-k military school. It helps when I'm losing my cool with him. I just don't know what to do with him anymore. Vance is never home, so he doesn't get why I'm so fraustrated with him. *sighs*

Caleb is learning to talk. He loves the word trash, its funny to him. He picks things up and throws it away so he can say trash. Goofy baby. He says hi, mama, dada, no, cookie, granny, etc. Granted some words he might say to you, might make you wonder. But I pretty much know what he's trying to tell me. He'll be 18 months on the 30. Need to get him in for shots soon, not looking forward to that. I always feel bad when he's crying on the table, getting them.

Vance officially starts classes at CTU on the 17. Which means more alone time with the kids. Sucks, but its fine. He's always busy it seems, sometimes I only see him when he's eating and sleeping. Makes me sad that he's always so busy, but I understand. The boys don't, I don't think he gets that at times. I try to tell him, but he seems to think I am picking a fight. When I'm not. *sighs* I get fraustrated at times, but keep it in. I know I shouldn't.

Anyways, I'm going to get off that topic. Off to try to get Caleb to bed, I'm sleepy. Night everyone. Comment if you like, its nice to hear from everyone. :o) Sorry for any typo's to tired to correct any, lol.

Halloween Pics

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Taking a break for a few

She wanted to take a pic with the boys

but they were not having it

Doesn't he look thrilled?

Bryce ready to get candy

Bryce ready to get going

Vance and the boys

So since I'm having a slow day, and not feeling to good. Thought I would post the kids pics from last night, before I have the urge to get sick again. The boys have had the runs most the day, so they are crabby and not feeling anything but sleep.

Kids being goofy

Caleb chilling on mommys lap

They wanted to take the camera away from me.

Caleb looks evil in this picture.

Getting ready to attack mommy

Bryce making silly faces.

Bryce wearing his newborn cap.

What's wrong with me?

I have no idea where to start this blog. I have so much anxiety and stress it seems. I want so badly for everything to work out. For everything to get better in the next few months. I have so much to do for baby still. Seriously I have done nothing to get ready for baby. In less you count buying maternity clothes for the pregnancy, because that's about the only thing pregnancy related.

I still have stuff from when I had Bryce and Caleb. But am in need of some stuff. Like crib, car seat, baby tub, clothes, etc. Makes me sound like I have nothing huh? That's what I keep saying but Vance will disagree with me. He seems to have forgotten what all babies need. I told him on November 15 after our 3d ultrasound and I find what we're having I am going to start buying things for baby. Like I plan on getting baby crib and car seat after the ultrasound. Or the next day.
I'm so scared we won't be ready for baby, and my mid wife seems to scare me every time I go in, reminding me how this baby could be early, etc.

On top of that I need to get Lucy to the vet so she can be admitted for heart worms. We've had her for a month on Nov 3. She's on pills right now that are killing the baby heart worms. But she needs to be admitted for shots to kill the adults or queen worm as the vet put it. She lays around all day, the meds keep her pretty tired. She loves to cuddle, all she wants to do is cuddle. Which is nice, when I'm feeling lonely on bed rest.

Oh another thing to get ready for is Christmas, need to get the boys gifts. Not sure what we're getting them yet, even thought Bryce loves telling me what he wants all the time. But every time he changes his mind. Plus we're having family down this year. Not going to Texas since Vance is saving leave for when baby gets here. Probably go down this time next year.

Pregnancy wise I'm doing ok. Bored of bed rest, not much to talk about with a 3yr old all day. I get lonely sitting around the house, which also give me more time to stress about everything we need to have done in the next 3 months. I want everything done so in February all about babys birth, then the move. Yes we have to move right after words. Can't stay in this apartment no longer, plus my neighbors are annoying. If you could come over here and see the stupid shit they do at night you would see why I hate it here.

I wish I could stop stressing about everything. I wish I could get my mind to shut up at night. Its driving me crazy. Try talking to Vance about it, but he doesn't seem to get it. Plus he's been busy with work and now he's getting ready to start classes at CTU. So he won't be home at all really. He keeps reminding me on how busy he'll be. How I probably won't see him til night time. That doesn't seem to help, so use to being able to talk to him more. Now its more like seeing him sleep then off he goes. It sucks. Maybe I'm being to emotional. I have no idea. Just wish I didn't feel so stress or get so depressed easily.

Ugh, now I'm all teary eyed. I really don't even know how to describe how overwealmed I feel right now. I think I need a hug, sounds lame huh? Sometimes I wish I could just scream and maybe I would feel better. Anything to make me not so stressed. *sighs* I've alson notice that when I start stressing my fingers start twitching in different directions and it doesn't stop for awhile. Not sure why, that's new.

Well I'm going to go lay on the couch and cuddle with my doggy. She's laying there waiting for me to come give her some attention. Someone please tell me I'm not the only one like this..that its my hormones or something????

Where did my feet go?

22 weeks and 2 days!

As you can see though from the first picture, my feet have disappeared. I can still see the tip of my big toe so that's something right? If I lay on my back I can pretty much see where baby is laying and watch it swim away when I poke it. :o) Yes I like to poke and play with baby, then baby usually kicks the crap out of me and wins. Since after a few good kicks I need to pee, lol.

So far everything is going good, have a tummy bug going on at the moment. I've gained 6lbs so far this pregnancy, I'm sure that will change since I'm starting to gain a lb a week for baby.

Bryce scared me today, while I was using the bathroom. He unlocked the back door and took Lucy outside to play. I came out of the bathroom to find the patio door open and them both missing. Caleb couldn't get out with them since baby gate was blacking the kitchen. Luckily they were both right outside the door, he was watching Lucy go potty. She came back in when I said come here, unlike Bryce who yelled at me to leave him alone and tried to run away. I'm so glad nothing bad happen to him, but now I'm more paranoid that he might try to get out at night when we're all asleep or something. I hope he never does that again. I tried to talk to him but all he could say was "your mean mommy". He ran in his room screaming your mean for 30mins then passed out for the night. Why do kids do that???? Is he trying to give me an heart attack???

*sighs* I'm going to have another talk with him in the morning when he gets up. I doubt I'll sleep tonight since I'm scared he'll do it again.

Venting.

So the other night I had the pleasure of being up most the night with contractions. Called L&D but they said to stay home til I had 6 in an hr. I only got up to 5 an hr and they were never regular. So false labor the dr said on the phone and said to sleep it off. I didn't sleep but I did try to. Also the doctor asked that I keep someone at home thru the night just in case I started having regular ones and needed to be brought in. Luckily Vance was able to get off for the night, so grateful the people were willing to stand his midshift after working thru the day so he could be with me. It help to know that he was right there if we needed to go in. I'm only 21wks and already getting contractions. I know still early, I've never gotten any on my own before. Maybe I'll finally go into labor my own this time around. Hopefully not before 36 weeks though.


My kids are driving me up the wall. Bryce is driving me crazy, and I know its from being bored. He doesn't get why I'm stuck home all day and why he can't go see friends. I feel horrible but not much I can do. Plus even if I wasn't on bed rest, Vance has my car everyday at work so I'm car less for awhile still. It sucks.

Today Vance is at a local college enrolling and meeting people. The Navy is paying for his college while we're on shore duty. I'm happy for him, since he's been pumped about going since we got here. Yes it means he will barely be home now with work and classes. So more for me to take on with the kids. I really need help at times with them, but I hate asking people at all.

Like today Vance is gone at the college, the kids some how climb in the closet. How not sure since Bryce bed and the heavy ass changing table are in the way. But they did, Caleb was lodge under the stroller, car seat and whatever junk we have stored in there. So I had to move the damn changing table by myself, and then get everything off of him and pull him out. I freaking pulled something while moving the damn changing table. So now my lower back hurts and I have adominal pain. It felt like something popped when I was moving the changing table. It freaking hurts and I'm in so much pain right now. Caleb is fine now, and I don't think he'll try to get back in there ever again. Not sure how he ever got in there. Wish Vance was done so he could come home, really want to lay in bed right now til the pain goes away. But he probably won't be home til 5ish. They were doing it all today, campus tour, meeting staff, enrolling, etc. He's not answering his cell, so no luck there.

Caleb was up all night last night crying. Not sure why, maybe his ears? Keeping an eye on him. Bryce was up til 11 last night crying that he didn't feel good, his throat hurts he says. So probably taking him to the dr soon.

I know my midwife is big on me resting and taking it easy. But with the kids and vance never home, I honestly don't see that happening. I try though, I try just laying on the couch drinking water. Just the kids need me for everything. I've already been slacking on house work, poor house looks like a tornado hit. I don't know, wish it was Feb. already. Ready to have baby and not have to worry about everything anymore. Why does the placenta have to be low? Hope it moves up like she expects and that in a few weeks she won't mind me doing everyday things anymore.


*sighs* Only a few more months, I need to get to work on buying baby stuff already. Plus we need to find a new place thats bigger. On top of that get a new car big enough for 3 car seats. I'm starting to think we'll never be ready for baby.

I'm going to get off here, just wanted to vent. Need to get an ice pack or heating pad for whatever it is I pulled. Sorry if I haven't return anyones calls, just things are hetic. I feel horrible for not calling people back. :o(

Todays baby apt

Saw my midwife Mercedes today, for my apt after ultrasound. She said placenta is fine, the guy in labor and delivery read it wrong. It is not covering my cervix, so no c-section! But it is low, so she thinks bed rest is best to avoid any more bleeding scares. Baby looks healthy and right on track. So far I have gained only 5lbs this pregnancy, woohoo! Usually its more like 15 with the other two. So just 5lb is nice this time. Baby is in the 47% range. She said if my weight gain stays the same, baby should be 7lbs. Just like big brother Bryce was. So guess Caleb was our chunky butt so far at 8lbs 2 1/2oz. She's expecting a nice tall and skinny baby. Placenta is in the back of my uterus, so that helps me feel that baby more then most woman at 20wks. Plus its thinned out from the other 2 pregnancies.

All in all baby is healthy, heartbeat was 156 today. Nice and steady. So I'm happy. Now I'm going to sit back and take it easy on bed rest like she said to do. Just chill out at home, relaxing. Til I see the doctor again on November 14 at 9:45am. She also pointed out how next time she will have to torture me with nasty glucose testing, yuck! She actually goes down to labs every once in awhile and drinks some to see what the patients hate about it, lol.

Glad we're paying for a 3d ultrasound next month. Tricare will not want anymore ultrasounds done on me in less really bad happens. So next month will be our last one til baby comes out. Can't wait to make sure of baby sex and start plannig everything.

Well I need to go, going to get the boys to bed soon. Then relax with hubby on the couch.

Baby Pics!

Looks like a penis here but then it disappears. So tech wasn't sure.
Babys face and tummy

Babys foot, this is my fave pic. You can see babys toes!

Just wanted to post pics from yesterday. Finally got them up on the computer. I love the foot pic, you can see little toes and everything. Baby is weighing in at 12 1/2 oz. Big baby so far. Look at its tummy! All of its organs looked good on the ultrasound. So happy to know baby is nice and healthy. See my doctor tomorrow to talk about my placenta and cervix. Hopefully all goes well there. Probably back to bed rest I go, boo! But need to do whatever it takes for baby. :o)

Anyone have any guesses on babys sex? I hate waiting til next month for 3d ultrasound. We'll know for sure then, plus get to see what baby looks like. Well baby look more like mommy or daddy?

Tagged by Jenn!

Bryce and Caleb with their uncle Bryan. All wearing their car pj's!


Here's how this one works: "Pick your fourth picture file and the fourth picture from that and post it.




I have tagged.....Megan, Alysia, Jean, and Brandi. Have fun!

Hospital Visit

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Baby checkup and Lucy

19weeks and 5days



So went to the doctor yesterday for my checkup. Baby heartbeat is 154, still measuring a wk bigger. Probably going to be a chunky baby like Vance, lol. We talked about the bleeding and checked my cervix. They said my cervix looks fine, but looks like the blood is from inside my uterus. So I'm to lay around the house til we have my u/s on the 14. Dr thinks my placenta is partially or fully covering my cervix. If so, I will have to have a c-section and go on bedrest til I deliver. Just to make sure baby and I are ok. They she talked about if I have to have a c-section then my hemorrhaging will be worse then they are hoping for probably. So she will have blood ready for me. *sighs* I'm really nervous but keep telling myself everything will be ok. My quad screening came back for down syndrom, and all that fun stuff. It was negative so no worry there. Counting down til the 14, ready to find out boy or girl. I have a feeling its a girl. I was right when I said I was having a boy both times. So hopefully I'm right!

Lucy is home with us. We have had for 5 days, she is starting to come out her shell. Took her to the vet the day we got her. Dr said she is 10lbs under weight, has heart worms, looks like she was used for breeding then tossed away. She's on antibiotics, go in on the 15 to be admitted for heartworm treatment. She will be in the hospital for a few days. Then has to come home and lay around for a month, while the adult worms die and pass thru her system. If she doesn't rest she could have an attack. We already bought her a nice comfy bed to lay on and some toys. She slowly coming out of her shell, loves the attention she gets. The boys love wrestling her.

Everything is going good, money is really tight. With Lucy needing to be admitted, and Vance truck needs lots of work. Plus we still need to get ready for baby and get a bigger car. We'll make it though, we always do. Well guess I need to get off here, ready to put the boys to bed. Need some quiet time.

Texas

Just wanted to post pictures from Texas and a video as well. We had fun, sucks that we had to leave early but had fun. Anyways here is some pictures. Posted the rest on myspace.

Bryce chilling in his booster seat





Bryce eating at Babes

Cheesing for the camera
Caleb pigging out at Babes. He loves to eat!
He's not a morning person, in til he gets breakfast.
Vance and Lucy, yes thats a pull up, she was in heat.
My sis Kaylene and the donkeys, she likes to visit.
My brothers Craig and Bryan
Caleb with his pop pop
Bryce playing with his mema
Bryce tickling his grandma
Caleb being tickled



Video of Bryce wrestling his grandma, and scrappy helped him.